![[Bottel] Sticks and stones...](../img/castbar2.gif){kind=small}
First Published on: Thursday, 7 August 1997
| [Serious Announcer] | How do we finish this scene? |
| [Silly Announcer] | We need something like a good hanging... |
| [Bottel] | Come gather round and listen And lift a cup to memory Of a stout hard working peasant Much the same as you and me |
| [Bottel] | He was but a simple goose-herd A poor but happy peasant man When the King's guard came to see him To gather taxes from the land. |
| [Enthusiastic Chorus] | |
| [Chorus] | We've got him in the dungeon |
| [Babbel] | In respect he was lax... |
| [Chorus] | Yes, we're going to hang the goose-herd |
| [Quibbel] | But he only tried to pay his tax... |
| [Bottel] | When the guards came a-calling The goose-herd said |
| [Battel] | "I'll try to pay" |
| [Bottel] | But he hadn't any money To send off in the usual way |
| [Bottel] | So he went out to his goose-pens To choose the finest in his herd And he told the waiting guardsmen |
| [Battel] | "I'd like to give the King the bird" |
| [Enthusiastic Chorus] | |
| [Bottel] | The guardsman's face was livid |
| [Captain] | "You cannot speak so of the King" |
| [Chorus] | So we took him to the Sherrif To have the Law explain the thing |
| [Bottel] | But the goose-herd was determined He was a man true to his word. |
| [Battel] | "If I cannot pay in money Then I shall give the King the bird" |
| [Enthusiastic Chorus] | |
| [Bottel] | Oh the Sherrif took to shouting |
| [Sherrif] | "A court of nobles should convene To keep this peasant quiet And keep such rabble from our King" |
| [Bottel] | So we gathered all the peerage But still the man would not be swerved |
| [Battel] | "If I cannot pay my taxes Then I should give the King the bird" |
| [Enthusiastic Chorus] | |
| [Bottel] | We were ready for a hanging When in the King's own herald came He cried out... |
| [Herald] | "I have the answer Keep silence in the King's own name " |
| [Bottel] | He approached the goose-herd kindly |
| [Herald] | "You see you poorly chose your words It is not the proper etiquette To try to give the King the bird" |
| [Pause for enlightenment] | |
| [Bottel] | Then the goose-herd seemed to brighten As if a light came to his head |
| [Battel] | "If I cannot give the King the bird I'll give the Queen a goose instead" |
| [Final Enthusiastic Chorus] | |
| [Chorus] | Oh, you know we hung that goose-herd |
| [Bottel] | In respect he was lax... |
| [Chorus] | Yes, you know we hung that goose-herd |
| [Quibbel] | But he only tried to pay his tax |
| [Reprise] | |
| [Chorus] | Oh, yes we hung that goose-herd |
| [Bottel] | In retrospect he was lax... |
| [Chorus] | Yes, we went and hung that goose-herd |
| [Battel] | "But I only tried to pay my tax" |
Adapted with permission from the original © by
Mikal the Ram (Mikal Hrafspa) at
Cantaria
Notes:
To the tune "Nancy Hogan's Goose"
[Quibbel] Yes, but I know not this tune...
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