![[Bottel] Sticks and stones...](../img/castbar2.gif){kind=small}
Sometimes The Fools just try too hard.
Sometimes the Fools get out of control of even their creator.
Battel is SUPPOSED to be in control of the rest of them.
Now the basic mission of The Fools as established in the First series, was to put one over The GRAND PUNTIFF, but sometimes one is never sure whether they really win or not.
| [Silly Sam] (the Silly Announcer) | On the Steps, the GRAND PUNTIFF be talking to an unknown stranger, not often seen here. |
| [Robin] | Oh GRAND PUNTIFF! I beg you to please enlighten me, as to just what be an "anno-uncment" if thou dost perform it? Dost one need to wash after? Be it some sort of Religous Rite? Or be it just similar to a Papal "Bull"? |
| [GRAND PUNTIFF] | Why Robin, you surprise me! I thought you of all people (including your Fools) would be wise enough to deduce the answer. |
| [Robin] | Ah, But good my Lord GRAND PUNTIFF, I think that be most of my trouble, for indeed, my troupe of Fools HATH been helping me, in spite of my most fervent wishes. I wish to make a Public Announcement... |
| [Silly Sam] | Can I do it? Please? Please? |
| [Robin] | GO AWAY SILLY PERSON! |
| [Robin] | DISCLAIMER: I be Robin the Ruthless in Battel, AoA, G.A. TWIT, WOAW etc. Be it here known by these presents... |
| [Bottel] | How come you give him presents and not me? |
| [Robin] | Quiet! Um... Err. Be it here known ahhm... BECAUSE I SAY SO! that um... Oh I forgot what I wanted to say now! Um... |
| [GRAND PUNTIFF] | Whereas "anno domini" be the Year of Our Lord (or, for the non-Christian, the Year of Their Lord) and "anno societatis" be the Year of the Society (or SCA). |
| [Lady de Kupkake] | What about the Year of Chocolate? |
| [GRAND PUNTIFF] | Then obviously "anno uncment" be the Year someone is declared and uncle! (Deep bow with flourish) |
| [General Fx] | Ta Da! Boom! |
| [Battel] | Sorry, my Lord, what you have said doth not make sense... |
| [Quibbel] | You expect the GRAND PUNTIFF to make sense? |
| [Battel] | No Fool! That be his line! Play with your own parts! |
| [Quibbel] | Ooooohhhhh! |
| [Battel] | My Lord what you have said doth not make sense and indeed also lacketh Logic, for thou hast stated that Somone... |
| [Quibbel] | Who be Somone? |
| [Babbel] | No, you Fool, that be an error in the script caused by a printers devil. It verily should read "Someone". |
| [Battel] | Someone? Who? |
| [Babbel] | Well that be part of the basis, ipso pro facto, of the logical point, you see. We don't know. |
| [Quibbel] | Can we not ask? |
| [Babbel] | It be not relevant. |
| [Bottel] | Well, if it be not relevant, then why be we talking about it? |
| [Battel] | Devil take it! Now, where was I? Oh yes... GRAND PUNTOFF... |
| [Silly Sam] | Oooh I like this game! |
| [Battel] | Aghhh! GRAND PUNTIFF!!!, it doth not make sense for thou hast stated that SOMEONE... |
| [Babbel] | ...No need to get upset! It just be a game for the sake of Pete. |
| [Bottel] | Who be this Pete? And why be we playing it just for his sake? |
| [Jaz] | Well, for the sake of whom wouldst thou like to play it? |
| [Battel] | ...that SOMEONE ... ...be declared - I quote "and uncle"... |
| [Quibbel] | Sure it just be not that printers devil again? |
| [Battel] | Look we got him on the ropes here. Just be quiet and read thy scripts. |
| [Silly Sam] | But if we be quiet then we will not be heard. Would not it be better to read our scripts out loud? |
| [Battel] | YES!!! Thank you for that! ...um... ah... that Somone... SOMEONE! was declared I quote "and uncle". Now Logically, that meaneth that this someone... |
| [Quibbel] | Yes but, we know not who it be... |
| [Battel] | YES!!! ...must have been created "some other thing" as well as being created "'uncle". |
| [Babbel] | It be a matter of the conjunction you see. Thou cannot have a conjunction with a "nothing". |
| [Quibbel] | My sister got married. Mother said he was a... |
| [Bottel] | Why speak clearly when we can hire lawyers to confuse us by teaching us to speak like them? |
| [Battel] | Please explain GRAND PUNTIFF! |
| [Bottel] | Yes, go on! |
| [Babbel] | Got you now! Haha! |
| [Quibbel] | Be he wearing his cap of Logical Underhancement? |
| [GRAND PUNTIFF] | Thou hast caught me out! Or hast thou? From thy analysis of my reponse we may assume: |
| 1) You be a clandestine Steps lawyer (horrors!) leaping at every small typo or quibble (oops, sorry---Quibbel be one of your people, not so?) 2) My cunning use of syntax (as opposed to puntax) fooled you. 3) I was declaring that I was once again overmatched by your low cunning and was crying "uncle" 4) Your henchperson was right, and I was confounding you by an absence of logic (ipso facto and tipsy too---attorneys-at-law) 5) It was merely a typo, and when you awake it will all have been a dream ("Look, Toto---we're not in Lochac anymore!") | |
| [Robin] | This be a DISCLAIMER: |
| I be Robin the Ruthless in Battel, AoA, G.A. TWIT, WOAW etc. Be it here known by these presents... shut up!... that I be a Real Person, and be a totally seperate entity from the characters known on these Steps as "Battel, Bottel, Babbel, Quibbel, Lady de Kupkake, Lady Lucrativa" or any of the countless others who hang around with them. All I want is a quiet life! | |
| Oh! And MOST ESPECIALLY I have absolutely no responsibilty for the lunatic actions of that unknown shady character calling himself <ANTIR5>. I be the only one who talks sense here! | |
| [Bottel] | That be what he thinks! |
| [<#|:->] | ..... |
Robin the Ruthless in Battel. Pro Bono Scribe for The Fools Troupe. | |
| [Babbel] | All hope abandon, ye who seek sense here. |
| [Bottel] | All sense abandon, ye who seek hope here. |
| [Robin] | Get out of my signoff area! This is MINE! You've finished for today! GO HOME! All I want is a quiet life... (sobs)... |
With assistance from: Roboscribe aka
Donn an Bronach, Grand Puntiff
"The rubber chicken having wrought, moves on"
Thou art a Patron to this Performance
Return to the Virtual Fooles Troupe
or proceed to Robin's 
© 1994-2002: Robin Hayes